Gwen just adopted two little kids from Africa. As usual, Im posting something that someone else wrote, because I think these ladies are so freaking awesome. Once again, convicting.
"Daisy is always telling me "MAMA COME" ... no matter if she wants me to sit beside her, get in the pool w/ her, sleep w/ her, eat w/ her, or take her to the potty ... She simply wants me w/ her and it has me thinking about the 147 MILLION ORPHANS of the world that are whispering in their hearts, yelling in the sleep, or dreaming daily of "MAMA COME" ... This is not going to be a new challenge from me because I am a broken record when it comes to the orphan crisis, but if God has put it on your heart in any capacity to consider adoption then please take the next step ... There is NO GUESS work about it because there are children WAITING for "MAMA COME" ...
Each time Daisy says it, I can literally hear the Lord calling me ... It is HIS voice I hear coming out of that angelic little voice ... It is His eyes that light up when we cuddle up together or jump in the pool...
I just can't say enough how the adoption journey starts with one BIG HUGE FAITH STEP ... From a new tired, exhausted, joyful, happy, stressed, crazy, peaceful mother of 6, I can say each minute is worth it ... A CHILD IS WORTH IT ..."
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
My Grandma
Who out there has an amazing Grandma? I do I do! This Friday is my Grandma's *7Th Birthday (She reads this so I'm not giving her actual age). I love my Grandma and love all the times that I get to see her. She is hip, young, and fun to be around. She is not a typical Grandma. You would never know she wasnt 40 years old by talking to her. In fact, most of her friends are in their 40s and 50s. Looking back on my childhood, I always respected and loved my Grandma. She was always the peacemaker of the house. She never yelled. If I spilled milk or juice everywhere she would just tell me that it was OK and clean it up. She never got upset (or at least didn't let us see that she was upset) 
When I think about my Grandma, I think about this verse: Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God." Matthew 5:9.She is a peacemaker. There were so many times in her life (I heard all kinds of stories about things like my grandpa bringing a pregnant dog home without asking her and stuff like that) when she could have flipped out and yelled and screamed and probably, justifiably, punched my Grandpa in the face(she would never have considered this...I'm just saying, she could have) She had to travel like crazy because my Grandpa was in the air force. She never really got to put roots down, and while I know she wasn't the perfect wife (Although very close) she never complained about it. She is such a good example to me about what a peacemaker looks like. We are not called to be wrathful, vengeful people. We are called by God to be Peacemakers, and that is what she has been. I love you Grandma! Happy Birthday!
When I think about my Grandma, I think about this verse: Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God." Matthew 5:9.She is a peacemaker. There were so many times in her life (I heard all kinds of stories about things like my grandpa bringing a pregnant dog home without asking her and stuff like that) when she could have flipped out and yelled and screamed and probably, justifiably, punched my Grandpa in the face(she would never have considered this...I'm just saying, she could have) She had to travel like crazy because my Grandpa was in the air force. She never really got to put roots down, and while I know she wasn't the perfect wife (Although very close) she never complained about it. She is such a good example to me about what a peacemaker looks like. We are not called to be wrathful, vengeful people. We are called by God to be Peacemakers, and that is what she has been. I love you Grandma! Happy Birthday!
Thursday, June 17, 2010
WHAT ARE WE DOING!?!?!
Ok yall, I know I keep posting stuff from other people's blogs, but I have found these amazing women who are living their lives for Christ and have a huge love and passion for orphans and I just cling to everything they say. I want to adopt some of these kids sooo badly right now, but I know thats not in God's plan for us at this moment...one day though...bring it on. Im going to have as many of these little orphans as God allows...get ready family. We are going to be a very colorful family:) Ok so here is what one of these ladies wrote and I couldnt agree more. Her name is Susanne and she is the mom of 7 kids. 3 are adopted and one of them (the youngest) is HIV+. Here is her blog if you want to check it out
"I just returned from the Nashville airport where we welcomed the Mihnovich sibling group from Ethiopia. There are FOUR of them and these children are BREATHTAKING. I remember when Tracey told me that they were going to start the paperwork on them....my thoughts were "a sibling group of four? now THAT IS RADICAL!" I even thought that same thought on the way to the airport tonight.... FOUR at one time? RADICAL.
I am going to be very vulnerable and share my heart. I am struggling. I have a significant battle going on between my heart and my mind. There are "truths" that I KNOW from scripture and there are "truths" that I feel just from my relationship with my sweet Savior and then there are "beliefs" that I am surrounded by on a daily basis because of our culture.
As I looked at each one of the Mihnovich children I thought about how their parents passed and they were left as orphans with NO ONE to care for them. I got ANGRY. Not just a little angry...a LOT ANGRY. which leads me to my question..." WHAT ARE WE DOING? There are MILLLIONS of sibling groups living alone, with no running water, no bathrooms, no blankets, and no pillow. I often think.... If people were driving down the street in Brentwood (where I live) and saw children digging through the trash for food...what would they do? turn their head? If you were walking out of Kroger and saw a child shoeless, sitting on the ground asking for money to eat..what would you do? turn away? I know that not everyone is "called" to take a child into their home.....but why not? If "believers" are not "called" to care for these children THEN who is? My head is telling me "not every believer can take an extra child in" and my heart is asking my head"why not?" I cannot understand how people that have a personal relationship with Christ can KNOW that this is going on all around them and not do anything to help. So, my head takes this a step further....if Jesus Christ (in the flesh) was digging through the trash, how many people would stop and feed him? If Jesus Christ did not have a home, who would take him in? Wouldn't all believers be HONORED to have Jesus live in their home? Even if it was a bit of an inconvenience? I mean, it would be an extra mouth to feed. It also would totally change the dynamics of your household (sleeping, clothing, grocery bill, laundry). You might not even have "time for yourself" because you would have an extra person to think about. NOW, the truth that I know from scripture is Matthew 25:45 which says that Christ will reply "I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me." Sometimes I try to take things out of context in the bible but this one is pretty clear...don't you think?
Now, hear me say, I KNOW that there are families out there that are dealing with significant issues that leave them unable to bring other children in . BUT, also hear me say that the bible says that if you are a born again believer in Jesus Christ then you are RESPONSIBLE for these children.
One of the first things that we strive for as believers if to be Christlike. If Christ KNEW that there were children with no one to hold them, what would HE do? turn away? If Christ KNEW that there were children that needed a home, what would HE do? If Christ KNEW that there were children that were hungry, what would HE do? As believers, if we are doing all that is possible to be Christ-like..then why are there hundreds of MILLIONS of children with no one to love them? I simply do not understand.
I have a friend that when she traveled to get her child, he would purr like a kitten every time she would hug him. when I heard that, my heart broke in half. He was longing for love so badly that when he finally felt those warm arms around him, he would purr with contentment. A CHILD longing for love so BADLY that he couldn't contain himself when he FINALLY knew what it felt like to be loved. while this is sweet, how heartbreaking is it? I do not think that children are suppose to long for love this badly. I think that as the body of Christ we should NOT be able to go through a normal day KNOWING that there are children out there with such longing in their hearts. It ought to bother us so badly that we can't sleep at night. How did we get to this point? How did we get so numb to these facts? So, what is going to be our response when we stand before Christ? What will we say? "I bought some Ugandan beads?" (while that feeds meals to children in Uganda...probably not going to cut it when we stand before the Savior)
Now, I must admit that it wasn't until I haven't had time to myself or my days are filled with preschoolers that I even stopped to think about what I did with the time that I had. I want to challenge you. For 1 week, let's write down each day what we do to serve someone else. Every time you do something that is serving someone else write it down. At the end of the week,
compare the hours that are spent serving others to the rest of your day. Be honest. If your job consists of serving then you must have a heart check and see what parts of it have eternal value.
We might get just a small glimpse of how Christ sees us. scary huh?!"
"I just returned from the Nashville airport where we welcomed the Mihnovich sibling group from Ethiopia. There are FOUR of them and these children are BREATHTAKING. I remember when Tracey told me that they were going to start the paperwork on them....my thoughts were "a sibling group of four? now THAT IS RADICAL!" I even thought that same thought on the way to the airport tonight.... FOUR at one time? RADICAL.
I am going to be very vulnerable and share my heart. I am struggling. I have a significant battle going on between my heart and my mind. There are "truths" that I KNOW from scripture and there are "truths" that I feel just from my relationship with my sweet Savior and then there are "beliefs" that I am surrounded by on a daily basis because of our culture.
As I looked at each one of the Mihnovich children I thought about how their parents passed and they were left as orphans with NO ONE to care for them. I got ANGRY. Not just a little angry...a LOT ANGRY. which leads me to my question..." WHAT ARE WE DOING? There are MILLLIONS of sibling groups living alone, with no running water, no bathrooms, no blankets, and no pillow. I often think.... If people were driving down the street in Brentwood (where I live) and saw children digging through the trash for food...what would they do? turn their head? If you were walking out of Kroger and saw a child shoeless, sitting on the ground asking for money to eat..what would you do? turn away? I know that not everyone is "called" to take a child into their home.....but why not? If "believers" are not "called" to care for these children THEN who is? My head is telling me "not every believer can take an extra child in" and my heart is asking my head"why not?" I cannot understand how people that have a personal relationship with Christ can KNOW that this is going on all around them and not do anything to help. So, my head takes this a step further....if Jesus Christ (in the flesh) was digging through the trash, how many people would stop and feed him? If Jesus Christ did not have a home, who would take him in? Wouldn't all believers be HONORED to have Jesus live in their home? Even if it was a bit of an inconvenience? I mean, it would be an extra mouth to feed. It also would totally change the dynamics of your household (sleeping, clothing, grocery bill, laundry). You might not even have "time for yourself" because you would have an extra person to think about. NOW, the truth that I know from scripture is Matthew 25:45 which says that Christ will reply "I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me." Sometimes I try to take things out of context in the bible but this one is pretty clear...don't you think?
Now, hear me say, I KNOW that there are families out there that are dealing with significant issues that leave them unable to bring other children in . BUT, also hear me say that the bible says that if you are a born again believer in Jesus Christ then you are RESPONSIBLE for these children.
One of the first things that we strive for as believers if to be Christlike. If Christ KNEW that there were children with no one to hold them, what would HE do? turn away? If Christ KNEW that there were children that needed a home, what would HE do? If Christ KNEW that there were children that were hungry, what would HE do? As believers, if we are doing all that is possible to be Christ-like..then why are there hundreds of MILLIONS of children with no one to love them? I simply do not understand.
I have a friend that when she traveled to get her child, he would purr like a kitten every time she would hug him. when I heard that, my heart broke in half. He was longing for love so badly that when he finally felt those warm arms around him, he would purr with contentment. A CHILD longing for love so BADLY that he couldn't contain himself when he FINALLY knew what it felt like to be loved. while this is sweet, how heartbreaking is it? I do not think that children are suppose to long for love this badly. I think that as the body of Christ we should NOT be able to go through a normal day KNOWING that there are children out there with such longing in their hearts. It ought to bother us so badly that we can't sleep at night. How did we get to this point? How did we get so numb to these facts? So, what is going to be our response when we stand before Christ? What will we say? "I bought some Ugandan beads?" (while that feeds meals to children in Uganda...probably not going to cut it when we stand before the Savior)
Now, I must admit that it wasn't until I haven't had time to myself or my days are filled with preschoolers that I even stopped to think about what I did with the time that I had. I want to challenge you. For 1 week, let's write down each day what we do to serve someone else. Every time you do something that is serving someone else write it down. At the end of the week,
compare the hours that are spent serving others to the rest of your day. Be honest. If your job consists of serving then you must have a heart check and see what parts of it have eternal value.
We might get just a small glimpse of how Christ sees us. scary huh?!"
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Adoption Info and Questions
The Oatsvill family is about to finish their third and fourth international adoption. (First in China and now in Uganda) I know a lot of people who are considering some sort of adoption and thought that this post was very interesting. Gwen (the mom) is the writer of this blog, and if you like it you can check out more here She and her friend are the creators of 147millionorphans.com and I think they are amazing people.
"As the new year approaches, my house is clean, and I am seriously nesting waiting for the call about Joseph and Daisy, so I thought I would do a post on just the basics of adoption ... I mean if you are on the fence about adoption, foster care, or anything related to orphans perhaps you are just waiting on some clear simple information ... Maybe you just need someone to talk to or ask questions to ... Or just maybe this will be the first time God sparks your heart ... I want to be a vessel here ... What I am about to type is my family's personal experience ... My personal advice ... My heart's words !!!!
1. Basic questions ... What type of child is God calling you to (age, gender, race, domestic or international), Ransom to bring a child home (anywhere from $10,000 - $40,00), what is the right agency for us (Bethany Christian has a good China program, Gladney has good international programs, AGCI has a fab Ethiopia program, and there are many amazing domestic agencies both big and small to consider) ... try to steer clear of small agencies for international use that require lots of fees upfront, how long will we wait (hard to say, but waiting is just part of the blessing ), or how do we tell our families (If God calls you to adopt then who cares what friends and extended family think) ...
2. Emotional Journey ... This will be one of the most emotional and spiritual journeys of your life ... You will feel amazing highs and severe lows ... This is all a part of the road that will take you to your child ... Some of the best advice I can give you is that you SHOULD PREPARE YOUR FAMILY/YOURSELF FOR YOUR CHILD, NOT TRY TO FIT THEM INTO YOUR LIFE ... Fall deeply in love with them now even before you see their picture ... Begin to put yourself in your child's place ... Attempt to feel what they have felt no matter their age ... Abandonment, hunger, loneliness, loss of culture, loss of birth parents, possible loss of language, and loss of all that is familiar ... If you bring home an infant don't assume that one day they may not still have some of these feelings ... Now don't get me wrong, I fully believe in complete restoration for a child ... I teach all my children that God had them picked out before the beginning of time to be an Oatsvall ... He brought them to us in different ways, but this was always their path to us ... We will always honor our birth parents, pray for them, and remember them ... But at the end of the day THEY ARE MY CHILDREN ... I want them to feel secure in their place in THEIR family ... I would go to the ends of the earth to protect them, stand up for them, and would die for them if that was the price ...
3. Are you willing to accept change ... Your life will change as it does anytime you add another person to your family ... There will be less time, less energy, less funds, and less of everything, but there WILL BE ABUNDANT NEW BLESSINGS ... This is an amazing way to change the legacy you leave ... I have seen this change with each one of my children ... I have seen them look at people from other countries, w/ other colorS of skin and see no differences ... They just see another person created by God ... Another person to appreciate, another person to get to know, another person to learn a lesson from ... IT IS A BEAUTIFUL PICTURE ...
4. Have a voice ... When people start to ask questions, use the opportunity to SPEAK UP FOR THOSE WITH NO VOICE, WHO STILL REMAIN ORPHANS ... I don't begrudge people who adopt then come home and want to just be a quiet family and go on about their life, but that is not me ... I want to always advocate for adoptions, bring awareness and get people involved in caring for an orphan and SHINE THE BIGGEST LIGHT I can on an orphan's face so that no one can ever pretend they don't SEE THEM ...
5. Stay in the word ... God will have amazing treasures for you on this journey ... He will teach you things you never dreamed of and He will show you things about yourself you never knew ... He will show Himself to be exactly, who He has always been and always will be ... HE WILL AMAZE YOU AND WILL SHOWER YOU WITH HIS TRUTHS AND PROMISES ...
6. Find someone to walk this journey w/ you ... You and your husband will need a friend to journey with ... Make sure this person is on the same page with you, is walking closely with the Lord, and will love your new family with their whole heart ...
7. Special Needs Angels ... Many people ask me "how do you know if you should apply for a special needs child or not" ... Honestly, I can't answer that question for you ... Search deep in your heart and ask the Lord to point you to your child no matter where they are or what need they may have ... I can tell you that we learned more about the Lord and more about each other by bringing Maggie home ... She is our HOPE and has brought us more than we could have ever dreamed ...
Just had to empty my head and heart in this post tonight because I have had a feeling for the last couple of days that someone is reading my blog that just needed a little truth and encouragement to take this next step ... AM I TALKING TO YOU ???"
So John and I know that at some point, we would like to do international adoption. We know that that is not in our near future because of some other things going on (Im not pregnant) but at some point, we hope that that is a big part of our life. I thought this was a good post and wanted to share it!
"As the new year approaches, my house is clean, and I am seriously nesting waiting for the call about Joseph and Daisy, so I thought I would do a post on just the basics of adoption ... I mean if you are on the fence about adoption, foster care, or anything related to orphans perhaps you are just waiting on some clear simple information ... Maybe you just need someone to talk to or ask questions to ... Or just maybe this will be the first time God sparks your heart ... I want to be a vessel here ... What I am about to type is my family's personal experience ... My personal advice ... My heart's words !!!!
1. Basic questions ... What type of child is God calling you to (age, gender, race, domestic or international), Ransom to bring a child home (anywhere from $10,000 - $40,00), what is the right agency for us (Bethany Christian has a good China program, Gladney has good international programs, AGCI has a fab Ethiopia program, and there are many amazing domestic agencies both big and small to consider) ... try to steer clear of small agencies for international use that require lots of fees upfront, how long will we wait (hard to say, but waiting is just part of the blessing ), or how do we tell our families (If God calls you to adopt then who cares what friends and extended family think) ...
2. Emotional Journey ... This will be one of the most emotional and spiritual journeys of your life ... You will feel amazing highs and severe lows ... This is all a part of the road that will take you to your child ... Some of the best advice I can give you is that you SHOULD PREPARE YOUR FAMILY/YOURSELF FOR YOUR CHILD, NOT TRY TO FIT THEM INTO YOUR LIFE ... Fall deeply in love with them now even before you see their picture ... Begin to put yourself in your child's place ... Attempt to feel what they have felt no matter their age ... Abandonment, hunger, loneliness, loss of culture, loss of birth parents, possible loss of language, and loss of all that is familiar ... If you bring home an infant don't assume that one day they may not still have some of these feelings ... Now don't get me wrong, I fully believe in complete restoration for a child ... I teach all my children that God had them picked out before the beginning of time to be an Oatsvall ... He brought them to us in different ways, but this was always their path to us ... We will always honor our birth parents, pray for them, and remember them ... But at the end of the day THEY ARE MY CHILDREN ... I want them to feel secure in their place in THEIR family ... I would go to the ends of the earth to protect them, stand up for them, and would die for them if that was the price ...
3. Are you willing to accept change ... Your life will change as it does anytime you add another person to your family ... There will be less time, less energy, less funds, and less of everything, but there WILL BE ABUNDANT NEW BLESSINGS ... This is an amazing way to change the legacy you leave ... I have seen this change with each one of my children ... I have seen them look at people from other countries, w/ other colorS of skin and see no differences ... They just see another person created by God ... Another person to appreciate, another person to get to know, another person to learn a lesson from ... IT IS A BEAUTIFUL PICTURE ...
4. Have a voice ... When people start to ask questions, use the opportunity to SPEAK UP FOR THOSE WITH NO VOICE, WHO STILL REMAIN ORPHANS ... I don't begrudge people who adopt then come home and want to just be a quiet family and go on about their life, but that is not me ... I want to always advocate for adoptions, bring awareness and get people involved in caring for an orphan and SHINE THE BIGGEST LIGHT I can on an orphan's face so that no one can ever pretend they don't SEE THEM ...
5. Stay in the word ... God will have amazing treasures for you on this journey ... He will teach you things you never dreamed of and He will show you things about yourself you never knew ... He will show Himself to be exactly, who He has always been and always will be ... HE WILL AMAZE YOU AND WILL SHOWER YOU WITH HIS TRUTHS AND PROMISES ...
6. Find someone to walk this journey w/ you ... You and your husband will need a friend to journey with ... Make sure this person is on the same page with you, is walking closely with the Lord, and will love your new family with their whole heart ...
7. Special Needs Angels ... Many people ask me "how do you know if you should apply for a special needs child or not" ... Honestly, I can't answer that question for you ... Search deep in your heart and ask the Lord to point you to your child no matter where they are or what need they may have ... I can tell you that we learned more about the Lord and more about each other by bringing Maggie home ... She is our HOPE and has brought us more than we could have ever dreamed ...
Just had to empty my head and heart in this post tonight because I have had a feeling for the last couple of days that someone is reading my blog that just needed a little truth and encouragement to take this next step ... AM I TALKING TO YOU ???"
So John and I know that at some point, we would like to do international adoption. We know that that is not in our near future because of some other things going on (Im not pregnant) but at some point, we hope that that is a big part of our life. I thought this was a good post and wanted to share it!
Friday, June 11, 2010
Thought Provoking
"According to several different resources, there are an average of 147 million orphaned children in the world today (this statistic includes children who have lost only one parent as well), 11 million children starve to death each year or die from preventable, treatable illness. 8.5 million children work as child slaves, prostitutes, or in other horrific conditions, 2.3 million children world wide are living with HIV.
That is 168.8 million needy children. Seems like a big number, huh? It shouldn't, because there are 2.1 BILLION people on this earth who profess to be Christians. Jesus followers. Servants. Gospel live-ers. And id only 8 percent of those Christians would care for just ONE of these needy children, they would all be taken care of." ~ www.kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com
What in the heck are we doing thinking about ourselves all the time? Just thought it was a good quote and something to think about.
That is 168.8 million needy children. Seems like a big number, huh? It shouldn't, because there are 2.1 BILLION people on this earth who profess to be Christians. Jesus followers. Servants. Gospel live-ers. And id only 8 percent of those Christians would care for just ONE of these needy children, they would all be taken care of." ~ www.kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com
What in the heck are we doing thinking about ourselves all the time? Just thought it was a good quote and something to think about.
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Watch This!!!
This is a video of the book Im reading right now. SO GOOD! I strongly encourage you to watch it!
Radical by David Platt from Taylor Robinson on Vimeo.
Monday, June 7, 2010
Shout Out to Ryann Cate!!
Have you ever wondered what the most perfect child in the world looks like? Well, you don't have to wait any longer. This is her.
Why is she the most perfect child in the world? Well, let me tell you. This week Mark, Erin, and Ryann Cate moved to Seattle Washington. They were nice enough to let me come with them on this road trip to move their life up north. We spent 4 days in a car. The first day we drove to Kansas and spent 8 hours in the car. Ryann was perfect. She started out playing with her toys, then moved on to watching a movie or two. Every now and then she would say, "snack mama?" in the cutest little voice you have ever heard. We stopped at Dairy Queen for lunch (healthy!)and she ate her food and then asked for a "coin" so that she could get a gift out of the toy machine. After lunch, she took a nap and after her nap, she played some more. She would say things like, "Can we talk mama?" or "I love you mama." or "gift mama?" (Angie Wood gave her a gift for each day of our journey and she loved each one!) We got to the hotel and went out to dinner. She ate her rice and beans and was a happy little child. We got back to the hotel and Erin had made her a pallet on the floor. She was so excited about her bed that she got in and started talking to her bears. Precious. So anyway, day one went great. I assumed it was because it was just day one. I was pretty sure the next day would look differently because she would be so tired. I was wrong. 
Day two...or as I like to call it, "the longest day of my life," proved to be just as good. It took us 12 hours to get to Buffalo Wyoming. 12 hours! That's a long time to drive. I feel like I probably whined more than Ryann Cate did. Once again, she was perfect. Watched her shows, sang some songs about chicken and sauce, (an homage of the chick fil a food that she loves...she is going to miss it up there) and played with her toys. We stopped at Subway for lunch and she ate her turkey sandwich and kept asking if she could throw away her trash. We finally got to Buffalo and all she wanted to do was walk up and down the stairs. "Outside stairs mama?" over and over again. We walked around a putt putt course and I took a thousand pictures of her. She was so pleasant to be around. Many times throughout the day, she referred to herself as princess GiGi. (from a book my grandma got her) If I said, "Hey Ryann Cate" she would say, "I'm not Ryann Cate. I'm princess GiGi." We jumped on the bed for a while, and then she went to bed. Once again, a perfect day.
Day three: another 12 hour day...going down the mountains. I drove in the beginning of this trip. Ryann was perfect as usual. She was singing, watching movies, and at times, just sitting there and being quiet. She slept a lot of the day. We think it was because it was raining outside and it lulled her to sleep. When she was awake, she would look up at Erin and say, "So pretty mama." (referring to the mountains)or "Mama. Your my best friend." She was a perfect child again. We stayed the night in Couer D'Alene Idaho (BEAUTIFUL!) We went out to dinner at this awesome Italian restaurant where they brilliantly decided to give every kid some plado and dried pasta with string. Ryann Cate and I used this to make a birthday cake and a necklace for her. She wore it for the rest of the trip:). That night we played in the hotel room. Even though Erin asked Ryann to go to bed (like a good mom would do) Mark decided to play good cop and had her play around while Erin was getting ready for bed, all the while telling Ryann that as soon as mommy walked out of the bathroom, Ryann had to jump in bed and pretend she was sleeping. Erin of course, could hear everything through the bathroom wall:).
Day 4: The next morning we went hiking by a gorgeous lake and then had lunch at an AMAZING place called "Moon Time". I had this delicious sandwich with roasted poblano chili peppers and a cream cheese sauce with Swiss cheese...so good. Mark and Erin split Tacos and Ryann had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich which she tried to share with me as we did the "airplane" (the airplane flies the food into the kids mouth...I always do that to her to get her to eat her food, so this time she did it to me) Anyway, we started the last leg of our trip. Ryann was perfect. She watched her new favorite show "Dora the Explorer" on repeat about 3 or 4 times. We got to their new house and walked inside. BEAUTIFUL! Their kitchen is fabulous. They have nice clean carpet. Stainless steel appliances, great fixtures..etc. So, we start bringing stuff inside and these three little girls come out from next door and start playing. Ryann immediately says, "I wanna say hi mama. I wanna say hi. I wanna say hi mama. Mama can I say hi?" So we (Erin, Ryann, and I) go over and Ryann starts playing with them. I have never seen such a giddy little girl in my life. She was giggling like crazy. I really cant even describe how happy and bubbly she looked. I think it was all the pent up energey from 4 days in the car. Whatever it was, she was precious.
So, that is why Ryann Cate is the most perfect child in the world. And that is why I cried like a baby on the airplane after saying goodbye to her, and that is why I cried when I got home. Its not going to be easy being away from the most perfect child in the world. I love her very much!
Why is she the most perfect child in the world? Well, let me tell you. This week Mark, Erin, and Ryann Cate moved to Seattle Washington. They were nice enough to let me come with them on this road trip to move their life up north. We spent 4 days in a car. The first day we drove to Kansas and spent 8 hours in the car. Ryann was perfect. She started out playing with her toys, then moved on to watching a movie or two. Every now and then she would say, "snack mama?" in the cutest little voice you have ever heard. We stopped at Dairy Queen for lunch (healthy!)and she ate her food and then asked for a "coin" so that she could get a gift out of the toy machine. After lunch, she took a nap and after her nap, she played some more. She would say things like, "Can we talk mama?" or "I love you mama." or "gift mama?" (Angie Wood gave her a gift for each day of our journey and she loved each one!) We got to the hotel and went out to dinner. She ate her rice and beans and was a happy little child. We got back to the hotel and Erin had made her a pallet on the floor. She was so excited about her bed that she got in and started talking to her bears. Precious. So anyway, day one went great. I assumed it was because it was just day one. I was pretty sure the next day would look differently because she would be so tired. I was wrong. 
Day two...or as I like to call it, "the longest day of my life," proved to be just as good. It took us 12 hours to get to Buffalo Wyoming. 12 hours! That's a long time to drive. I feel like I probably whined more than Ryann Cate did. Once again, she was perfect. Watched her shows, sang some songs about chicken and sauce, (an homage of the chick fil a food that she loves...she is going to miss it up there) and played with her toys. We stopped at Subway for lunch and she ate her turkey sandwich and kept asking if she could throw away her trash. We finally got to Buffalo and all she wanted to do was walk up and down the stairs. "Outside stairs mama?" over and over again. We walked around a putt putt course and I took a thousand pictures of her. She was so pleasant to be around. Many times throughout the day, she referred to herself as princess GiGi. (from a book my grandma got her) If I said, "Hey Ryann Cate" she would say, "I'm not Ryann Cate. I'm princess GiGi." We jumped on the bed for a while, and then she went to bed. Once again, a perfect day. 
Day three: another 12 hour day...going down the mountains. I drove in the beginning of this trip. Ryann was perfect as usual. She was singing, watching movies, and at times, just sitting there and being quiet. She slept a lot of the day. We think it was because it was raining outside and it lulled her to sleep. When she was awake, she would look up at Erin and say, "So pretty mama." (referring to the mountains)or "Mama. Your my best friend." She was a perfect child again. We stayed the night in Couer D'Alene Idaho (BEAUTIFUL!) We went out to dinner at this awesome Italian restaurant where they brilliantly decided to give every kid some plado and dried pasta with string. Ryann Cate and I used this to make a birthday cake and a necklace for her. She wore it for the rest of the trip:). That night we played in the hotel room. Even though Erin asked Ryann to go to bed (like a good mom would do) Mark decided to play good cop and had her play around while Erin was getting ready for bed, all the while telling Ryann that as soon as mommy walked out of the bathroom, Ryann had to jump in bed and pretend she was sleeping. Erin of course, could hear everything through the bathroom wall:). 
Day 4: The next morning we went hiking by a gorgeous lake and then had lunch at an AMAZING place called "Moon Time". I had this delicious sandwich with roasted poblano chili peppers and a cream cheese sauce with Swiss cheese...so good. Mark and Erin split Tacos and Ryann had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich which she tried to share with me as we did the "airplane" (the airplane flies the food into the kids mouth...I always do that to her to get her to eat her food, so this time she did it to me) Anyway, we started the last leg of our trip. Ryann was perfect. She watched her new favorite show "Dora the Explorer" on repeat about 3 or 4 times. We got to their new house and walked inside. BEAUTIFUL! Their kitchen is fabulous. They have nice clean carpet. Stainless steel appliances, great fixtures..etc. So, we start bringing stuff inside and these three little girls come out from next door and start playing. Ryann immediately says, "I wanna say hi mama. I wanna say hi. I wanna say hi mama. Mama can I say hi?" So we (Erin, Ryann, and I) go over and Ryann starts playing with them. I have never seen such a giddy little girl in my life. She was giggling like crazy. I really cant even describe how happy and bubbly she looked. I think it was all the pent up energey from 4 days in the car. Whatever it was, she was precious.
So, that is why Ryann Cate is the most perfect child in the world. And that is why I cried like a baby on the airplane after saying goodbye to her, and that is why I cried when I got home. Its not going to be easy being away from the most perfect child in the world. I love her very much!
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Grace
To the left (and maybe up a little bit) of this post is a picture of a young woman holding a little baby. On the bottom of the picture are the words Amazima. Katie is the girl in the picture. I have posted about her before. She lives in Uganda and is an amazing example of what a follower of Christ looks like. This is her story of how she added her 12th child to her home. It is awe inspiring and convicting all at the same time. It encouraged me to listen more,and when I hear, to obey. Please read this story. God is good!
For eight months, Grace loved to take a bath. Then she turned three. Whoever named the “terrible two s” very obviously had not done three yet. Three is when all my girls learn to say “no.”
I don’t exactly remember when it started. One day, she just wouldn’t get in the bathtub. So I didn’t make her. Judge me if you want; she got in bed dirty that night. The fight just wasn’t worth interrupting everyone else’s bed time. But on the second night when she refused to bathe, I couldn’t just ignore her again. She really needed that bath. So we began the struggle.
Every night it is the same. It starts with me asking her to come and get in the bathtub, to which she quietly replies, “I don’t want.” I, in my kindest, sweetest Mommy voice explain to her that she is three years old. That she does not always know what is best for her and she does not always get what she wants. I tell her that this is about her health and well-being; everyone has to take a bath! She just looks at me, not getting it.
I try a different approach. I say excitedly, “Come on Gracie! Let’s go play in the bathtub!” And she blinks her eyes very fast, big crocodile tears beginning to run down her cheeks. One more plea for sympathy. When she sees that the tears are not getting her anywhere, she begins to shriek, “No bath, no bath, NO BATH!” as if the water may indeed melt her.
I say it more sternly this time. “Grace. Bath time.” I lift her to her feet and half drag her down the hall to the bathroom. Her sorrow turns to anger. She makes her best “I don’t like you mom” face, folds her arms and plops to her bottom. “I DON’T WANT,” she shouts.
So I pick her up. She kicks and screams and eventually I get her into the bathtub. She flails around in there for a bit, letting me know with her wails that I am ruining her life and she may never be happy again.
And then a funny thing happens. As she splashes water on herself she remembers. She likes the bath. The bath is fun. Not to mention a really great way to get clean. In fact most of the time, she doesn’t want to get out of the bath. You see, the bath time struggle is not at all about the bath. It is about obedience. She is three years old and she simply does not want to obey. She thinks it should be her decision whether or not she gets in the bathtub. She is three years old and she is trying to figure out just how much control she has in her little life (at this point, not much).
Maybe I am a really bad mother for not disciplining her more severely for her disobedience, but the reality is, little disobedient Grace reminds me so much of me.
A year ago, Grace was not my daughter. She was a two and a half year old little girl who could not walk, speak or use her hands. She lived with her very old great grandmother who had a very hard time taking care of herself, let alone a very special needs baby. Her grandmother, hunched over and with little Grace strapped on her back would walk seven miles to my house and beg me to please take her burden, her child. And I would say, “No.” It happened at least five times. I didn’t know this woman and I didn’t know anything about her or her child, but I knew this: I was NOT having any more children. I was maxed out. This was it. There was nothing I could do for a child that would never walk or talk. Only an insane person would take a special needs child as their twelfth daughter. I would give Grandma a bag of food and send her on her way. But sometimes, after I sent them away, I couldn’t get that little smile out of my head. Sometimes, that little smile would wake me up in the middle of the night. I would like to tell you that I prayed fervently about whether or not to take her. But I didn’t. I just told God straight, “I don’t want.” I told myself that eleven was enough, NO MORE KIDS.
Weeks passed and I forgot about the little lame girl and her great grandmother. About a month later I couldn’t sleep. I knew God was trying to tell me something, but I couldn’t figure out what it might be. I prayed and I listened. And he spoke as plain as day, “Your next daughter’s name is Sarah.” OK, funny God. I already have a daughter named Sarah. I went back to sleep. The next evening I was chopping carrots for beef stew and there it was again, “Your next daughter’s name is Sarah.” I prayed harder, “God, Sarah already lives here. I’m not sure I can hear you. God really, I don’t want another daughter. I think that eleven is enough, don’t you?” I continued my chopping. As I tucked the girls in bed that night, the extra bed in their room really bothered me. Bunk beds come in sets of two. We had to have six sets of beds to fit all eleven of my children, and with it came that extra top bunk. I had never paid it any attention, until now. After they fell asleep I went and sat in the bed and prayed. And God said it again, “Sarah, Sarah, Sarah.” I began to cry. “Lord, where is she? Where is Sarah? How can she be my daughter if I don’t know where to find her?” For the next several days, I dreamt of Sarah. I prayed for Sarah. I longed for Sarah. I missed Sarah.
A few days later, Grandma showed up at the gate again with her not-so-little baby tied to her back. “Please,” she begged, “God keeps telling me to come here for help.” It finally clicked. “What is her name?” I asked. “Sarah.” The little girl beamed, looked up at me, and said in a squeaky little voice, “Mommy”. Grandma looked as if she had seen a ghost. “She has never spoken,” she said, astonished. We both just turned our eyes heavenward. Ok, God, you win.
I asked the grandmother to please make herself at home while I called my children to have a “family meeting”. We always talk and pray together before making a big change in our home. I always ask the kids for their opinion, but of course my sweet children never say no! They were so excited to have a new little sister, their only concern was that they would now have two sisters named Sarah, and Sarah was feeling a little uncertain about sharing her name. I promised that we would give her a new name once we thought of one that fit.
As I carried my new little girl into the bedroom and put her in a new dress, fear overwhelmed me. What was I going to do? What does one do with a child that may never walk? How would I keep a semblance of normal life for my other girls? Would I have time to continue loving them enough while caring for a special needs little girl? Oh, what were people going to say? God just whispered that His grace would be enough, that His grace was sufficient, that His grace was going to allow me to raise this little girl, even after I had turned her away from my gate five times. Grace.
I took her to several doctors, all of whom said she had cerebral palsy, resulting from a lack of oxygen at birth. All agreed that while she may begin speaking (she had continued to utter only one word, “Mommy”) she would never walk. The fear still overwhelmed me. Some days I felt such sorrow for her poor little body, other days I felt anger. I wondered what life would look like from now on. And God continued to remind me that His grace would sustain me. And only by His grace, a month later my Grace began to walk. Within two months she was speaking, using her left hand a walking several meters without assistance. Today she runs (still a little awkwardly), has full use of her left hand and minimal use of her right, and speaks in full sentences in that same squeaky little voice.
I shudder to think what I could have missed in my disobedience. I am so thankful that God in His grace does not allow me to win. Because usually, the fight is not really about what He is asking me to do. It is not about the bathtub. It is about me, trying to figure out just how much control I have over my little life (at this point, not much). I would like to tell you that now I always do exactly what the Lord asks of me. I would like to tell you that I always seek Him first when a difficult situation presents itself. But sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I still think it should me my decision what I do with my life. He asks, and reasons, and encourages. He gently explains that I do not know what is best for me and that I do not always get what I want. And I just look at Him, not getting it. I whine and sob and shriek, just like a tired, angry three year old.
And so He picks me up, exhausted from struggling, and plops me in the center of His will for my life. And then a funny thing happens. As I kick and scream and struggle, I remember. I like being in the center of God’s will for my life. God’s plan is usually pretty great. It is a whole lot better than mine anyway. I am so glad that He does not allow me to win.
If you were to walk into my house at bath time, you may think I was a pretty horrible mother, letting my child kick and scream and wail on the floor like that. But I think sometimes we have to throw a fit, to been horribly resistant, to appreciate how awesome it is when we finally obey. I am hoping that one day soon, Grace will begin remembering how much she likes the bath before she begins crying, maybe even the first time I say that it is bath time. I am also praying that one day soon, I will begin remembering how much I love and desire God’s plan for my life before I begin questioning, maybe even the first time He asks something of me.
For eight months, Grace loved to take a bath. Then she turned three. Whoever named the “terrible two s” very obviously had not done three yet. Three is when all my girls learn to say “no.”
I don’t exactly remember when it started. One day, she just wouldn’t get in the bathtub. So I didn’t make her. Judge me if you want; she got in bed dirty that night. The fight just wasn’t worth interrupting everyone else’s bed time. But on the second night when she refused to bathe, I couldn’t just ignore her again. She really needed that bath. So we began the struggle.
Every night it is the same. It starts with me asking her to come and get in the bathtub, to which she quietly replies, “I don’t want.” I, in my kindest, sweetest Mommy voice explain to her that she is three years old. That she does not always know what is best for her and she does not always get what she wants. I tell her that this is about her health and well-being; everyone has to take a bath! She just looks at me, not getting it.
I try a different approach. I say excitedly, “Come on Gracie! Let’s go play in the bathtub!” And she blinks her eyes very fast, big crocodile tears beginning to run down her cheeks. One more plea for sympathy. When she sees that the tears are not getting her anywhere, she begins to shriek, “No bath, no bath, NO BATH!” as if the water may indeed melt her.
I say it more sternly this time. “Grace. Bath time.” I lift her to her feet and half drag her down the hall to the bathroom. Her sorrow turns to anger. She makes her best “I don’t like you mom” face, folds her arms and plops to her bottom. “I DON’T WANT,” she shouts.
So I pick her up. She kicks and screams and eventually I get her into the bathtub. She flails around in there for a bit, letting me know with her wails that I am ruining her life and she may never be happy again.
And then a funny thing happens. As she splashes water on herself she remembers. She likes the bath. The bath is fun. Not to mention a really great way to get clean. In fact most of the time, she doesn’t want to get out of the bath. You see, the bath time struggle is not at all about the bath. It is about obedience. She is three years old and she simply does not want to obey. She thinks it should be her decision whether or not she gets in the bathtub. She is three years old and she is trying to figure out just how much control she has in her little life (at this point, not much).
Maybe I am a really bad mother for not disciplining her more severely for her disobedience, but the reality is, little disobedient Grace reminds me so much of me.
A year ago, Grace was not my daughter. She was a two and a half year old little girl who could not walk, speak or use her hands. She lived with her very old great grandmother who had a very hard time taking care of herself, let alone a very special needs baby. Her grandmother, hunched over and with little Grace strapped on her back would walk seven miles to my house and beg me to please take her burden, her child. And I would say, “No.” It happened at least five times. I didn’t know this woman and I didn’t know anything about her or her child, but I knew this: I was NOT having any more children. I was maxed out. This was it. There was nothing I could do for a child that would never walk or talk. Only an insane person would take a special needs child as their twelfth daughter. I would give Grandma a bag of food and send her on her way. But sometimes, after I sent them away, I couldn’t get that little smile out of my head. Sometimes, that little smile would wake me up in the middle of the night. I would like to tell you that I prayed fervently about whether or not to take her. But I didn’t. I just told God straight, “I don’t want.” I told myself that eleven was enough, NO MORE KIDS.
Weeks passed and I forgot about the little lame girl and her great grandmother. About a month later I couldn’t sleep. I knew God was trying to tell me something, but I couldn’t figure out what it might be. I prayed and I listened. And he spoke as plain as day, “Your next daughter’s name is Sarah.” OK, funny God. I already have a daughter named Sarah. I went back to sleep. The next evening I was chopping carrots for beef stew and there it was again, “Your next daughter’s name is Sarah.” I prayed harder, “God, Sarah already lives here. I’m not sure I can hear you. God really, I don’t want another daughter. I think that eleven is enough, don’t you?” I continued my chopping. As I tucked the girls in bed that night, the extra bed in their room really bothered me. Bunk beds come in sets of two. We had to have six sets of beds to fit all eleven of my children, and with it came that extra top bunk. I had never paid it any attention, until now. After they fell asleep I went and sat in the bed and prayed. And God said it again, “Sarah, Sarah, Sarah.” I began to cry. “Lord, where is she? Where is Sarah? How can she be my daughter if I don’t know where to find her?” For the next several days, I dreamt of Sarah. I prayed for Sarah. I longed for Sarah. I missed Sarah.
A few days later, Grandma showed up at the gate again with her not-so-little baby tied to her back. “Please,” she begged, “God keeps telling me to come here for help.” It finally clicked. “What is her name?” I asked. “Sarah.” The little girl beamed, looked up at me, and said in a squeaky little voice, “Mommy”. Grandma looked as if she had seen a ghost. “She has never spoken,” she said, astonished. We both just turned our eyes heavenward. Ok, God, you win.
I asked the grandmother to please make herself at home while I called my children to have a “family meeting”. We always talk and pray together before making a big change in our home. I always ask the kids for their opinion, but of course my sweet children never say no! They were so excited to have a new little sister, their only concern was that they would now have two sisters named Sarah, and Sarah was feeling a little uncertain about sharing her name. I promised that we would give her a new name once we thought of one that fit.
As I carried my new little girl into the bedroom and put her in a new dress, fear overwhelmed me. What was I going to do? What does one do with a child that may never walk? How would I keep a semblance of normal life for my other girls? Would I have time to continue loving them enough while caring for a special needs little girl? Oh, what were people going to say? God just whispered that His grace would be enough, that His grace was sufficient, that His grace was going to allow me to raise this little girl, even after I had turned her away from my gate five times. Grace.
I took her to several doctors, all of whom said she had cerebral palsy, resulting from a lack of oxygen at birth. All agreed that while she may begin speaking (she had continued to utter only one word, “Mommy”) she would never walk. The fear still overwhelmed me. Some days I felt such sorrow for her poor little body, other days I felt anger. I wondered what life would look like from now on. And God continued to remind me that His grace would sustain me. And only by His grace, a month later my Grace began to walk. Within two months she was speaking, using her left hand a walking several meters without assistance. Today she runs (still a little awkwardly), has full use of her left hand and minimal use of her right, and speaks in full sentences in that same squeaky little voice.
I shudder to think what I could have missed in my disobedience. I am so thankful that God in His grace does not allow me to win. Because usually, the fight is not really about what He is asking me to do. It is not about the bathtub. It is about me, trying to figure out just how much control I have over my little life (at this point, not much). I would like to tell you that now I always do exactly what the Lord asks of me. I would like to tell you that I always seek Him first when a difficult situation presents itself. But sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I still think it should me my decision what I do with my life. He asks, and reasons, and encourages. He gently explains that I do not know what is best for me and that I do not always get what I want. And I just look at Him, not getting it. I whine and sob and shriek, just like a tired, angry three year old.
And so He picks me up, exhausted from struggling, and plops me in the center of His will for my life. And then a funny thing happens. As I kick and scream and struggle, I remember. I like being in the center of God’s will for my life. God’s plan is usually pretty great. It is a whole lot better than mine anyway. I am so glad that He does not allow me to win.
If you were to walk into my house at bath time, you may think I was a pretty horrible mother, letting my child kick and scream and wail on the floor like that. But I think sometimes we have to throw a fit, to been horribly resistant, to appreciate how awesome it is when we finally obey. I am hoping that one day soon, Grace will begin remembering how much she likes the bath before she begins crying, maybe even the first time I say that it is bath time. I am also praying that one day soon, I will begin remembering how much I love and desire God’s plan for my life before I begin questioning, maybe even the first time He asks something of me.
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